Wednesday, July 1, 2020


It has been over two years and I continue to help my dad be present and mobile every day. For the past ten months since August 2019 after his second major stroke, his legs still work, although he still can no longer speak. He is still not able to eat, drink, or stand up by himself. I'm thankful for his G-tube to help keep him alive. I'm grateful that he has been able to roll to the side when lying down and sit up from his bed for a bit at his own will once in a while. I'm also grateful that after me working to get him to eat chips and ice cream over a month ago, he hasn't drooled or coughed since. However, recently he does not seem to want to eat chips or ice cream anymore because he does not finish chewing and the food stays in his mouth until it goes down his throat on its own. His level of alertness has not declined further, and it seems he still can recognize family members from others, so I'm grateful for that.

It is so tiring to be a caregiver for a loved one, but I love my dad too much.

Today, my dad's legs are shaky for some reason when I got him to stand up, and I wasn't able to help him walk around in our neighborhood. His right foot seems a bit swollen, and I don't know what has happened. I'm going to give him a break for several days. I really hope it's not another permanent step downward.
“The race is long and, in the end, it’s only with yourself.”